Saturday, November 25, 2006

A Longing for Summer

We're not even into the month of December yet and I'm already starting to miss the summer season. I think what brought this feeling on was looking at a variety of summer-time pictures on the local newspaper's website. Just seeing everything green - from the leaves on the trees to the grass on the ground, really made me miss summer. There were pictures of people in their swim suits jumping into the lake to cool off and surfing. Children were eating ice cream and playing baseball. Families were enjoying the local events and watching a parade go down their city streets. It's the feeling of summer in these pictures that have awakened my summer senses and then I realize that we won't be able to experience these feelings again for another four or five months. And winter hasn't even started yet.

It's nothing to worry about, though. It's just a bit of sentamentalism on this last weekend in November. To be honest, we've had a nice fall season; November in particular, with warm conditions and hardly any sign of winter. We had our fair share of winter weather in October, but the snow melts so quickly this time of year that it was gone in a few days. We are now into the holiday season as we have passed Thanksgiving for another year. It doesn't really feel like the holiday season for me yet until we get a little snow on the ground and the Christmas music really starts to play often on the radio. People are already in the stores taking advantage of the stellar deals at five and six in the morning while I am quite contempt staying in bed and getting my full eight hours of sleep. When I see pictures of people lined up outside of the stores so early in the morning and then hear horror stories of people being stepped on and items being "stolen" from out of their carts; that's enough for me to stay home. Yes, the deals are tremendous at those early hours in the morning on the day after Thanksgiving, but it's only a gimmick that the big retailers are providing. They are jump-starting their holiday sales season and they do it every year. Needless to say, I won't be in any big rush to go to the stores the day after Thanksgiving in my lifetime.

I had a rather nonchalant Thanksgiving, as I had to work afternoon shift. Before our family dinner, I finished putting up the last of the Christmas lights on the house. I usually start putting them up around Thanksgiving and it's even better to put them up when the weather is still nice and there isn't two feet of snow on the ground. Then, my parents and I had an enjoyable feast with turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, pie, and all of the other usual Thanksgiving dishes. I felt a little disappointed that I had to work Thanksgiving; something I NEVER had to do in my life before. I remember when I was in school, we'd had a nice four-day weekend and I looked forward to the days off so much. Now instead of having time off during Thanksgiving, I'm working. Quite the reversal now when we grow up. But the pain of working Thanksgiving was softened by the fact of earning double time in a half. I guess it's not so bad afterall.

Well, I'll keep this blog relatively short. There will be more in the days to come. :-)

Sunday, November 12, 2006

My OTHER Friend from the Past

In my previous blog, you read about a best friend that I once had through my elementary and part of my junior high years in school. He moved away and I have had very limited contact with him since. This blog will be about the other friend that I mentioned briefly in the previous blog. He and I had a falling out, of sorts, around the time that Doug moved away. Here is that complete story.

I really can't exactly remember how Erik and I became friends. Honestly, I don't know that we would've been friends if it weren't for Doug. I can't really think of a more witty way to describe it other than to say without Doug, our friendship had lost its luster. Clearly Erik felt the same way and I despised him ever since for it.

Erik fit into our little group because he had a quiet side. However, he was smart and very sarcastic. He was very thin for as long as I've known him and if I remember right, he wore glasses during most of his elementary years. In fact, he was the smartest kid in our class. It would be a shock if he didn't always have straight A's because he was darn near close. I always remember many people telling him he'd be our class valedictorian because he was so smart. I think he got tired of hearing it, though, and vowed later on that it would never happen. Nontheless, we all thought it would be true in elementary.

I wouldn't say he was a star athlete, however, he sure could run. I remember playing tag during recess and myself or others having a great deal of difficulty trying to catch him. He ran cross country and track during his junior high and high school years, and he'd always be one of the fastest runners for our school. He also had a great deal of knowledge of our school, as well. His mother was a well-respected science teacher for the school and he would always tell me or Doug some of the "behind-the-scenes" news regarding the district. One story even involved my uncle who once taught as a P.E./Health teacher and coached girls basketball. My uncle had been picketing during a teacher's strike when a dog came up to him and urinated on his leg. Erik thought it was funny but I took some offense to it, considering that it was a relative he was talking about. He never said my uncle's name, but from everything he described, I'm pretty sure it was my uncle Erik was talking about. Our school underwent a great deal of change during my later-elementary years when one building was demolished and an entire new wing was constructed. Erik was able to give us details about the history of the old building. It's hard to remember too many details about our friendship anymore, but I remember Doug and I sitting on the swings and Erik talking about the old building as we looked at it. Something that I will always remember.

As I described in my last blog, Doug had moved away and I was left to fend for myself. I don't know what happened, but Erik's behavior had gone from day to night. He had a much darker sense of humor and he got his kicks out of picking on me constantly. He was pure eveil; I don't know if it was puberty that made him this way or what. Even some of my other friends took Erik's lead and were ganging up on me. It definitely came as a big shock. I didn't know what to do, so I basically just ignored and avoided them. I had become a loner and began to do things on my own. I was betrayed and it's a feeling I will never forget.

From what I can remember during our seventh grade year, Doug, Erik, and I still had a friendly relationship. We were all split up in different classrooms since we were now in junior high, but we still saw each other frequently. Up until the point Doug moved away, Erik and I were civil to each other. But beyond that, he was a different person. To this day I still cannot understand why he changed and what caused him to "hate" me so much. I don't know if he thought it was all one big joke but I never thought he was funny. We were in the same science team in junior high and high school and we were even partnered up in a few events. Those were the only moments I had contact with Erik during my final years in grade school. I simply hated his guts and he never apologized for his behavior, nor offered up an explanation why he acted the way he did. Instead of being the class valedictorian, he was now in the lower bracket of my class. He even had one memorable outburst during one of the classes I had with him, where the teacher sent him to the principal's office and left everyone in the room stunned. This was not the Erik we all knew. Whether it was something psychological or what ... I guess it's something we will never know. He even grew his hair long and dyed it black during our senior year! This being a complete reversal from the kid that once had his hair buzzed time and time again in elementary.

I do not offer up any explanations or excuses for Erik and his change of behavior towards me. I have my theories, but until someone asks him, those theories would never have any truth. I have long since moved on and haven't considered him my friend since junior high. A friend does not betray another friend and expect them to remain acquaintences. I have a few memories left of the Erik I once knew, but all of those are fading fast and I am still haunted by "evil" Erik after Doug left. To be honest, I hold no regrets and I don't miss him as a friend. I have simply moved on and the nice thing about graduating from high school is, you don't have to ever see those idiots (the ones that treat you the worst) again. The last I heard, Erik was enlisted in the military. Whether he still is; I haven't a clue.

Friday, November 10, 2006

A Friend from the Past

I first saw him in my first grade class; a new student to our school. Actually, we had many new faces in our school that year because our school consolidated with another school over 11 miles away. He was one of the students from that school and would soon become one of my best friends. We weren't always in the same classroom together. Our class was one of the biggest in the elementary, so we always were split into two classrooms. If I didn't see him in class, I always saw him at recess and other kinds of assemblies. We were best friends; but we usually only ever spent time together at school and never away from there.

His name was Doug and was always overweight for as long as I knew him. But that did not matter to me, nor did it to my other friend, Erik. His wardrobe usually consisted of sweatpants, a t-shirt, and velcrow tennis shoes. He was a nice, pleasant, quiet kid and never got upset unless he was teased profusely. I remember this one instance where he was really mad. A couple of the girls from my class picked on him because he allegedly wet his pants and the girls picked on him for "smelling bad." I thought this was extremely harsh treatment for someone who would never say anything unkind about another person like that. At recess, he absolutely refused to speak to anyone; not even to me. Even when I tried to cheer him up, he would just walk away. I guess he just needed some time by himself. But it was unusual to see him so upset like that; but it was understandable why he was that way.

I never considered him to be obese by any means; but he was definitely pudgy. And someday if he happens to come upon this blog about him, I hope he realizes I mean no disrespect about him, because his weight was never a hindrance to our friendship. He never excelled at sports or in gym class. We once played against each other in little league and our team always handly beat his team; but we never fought over that issue. He either played first base or left field; it's hard to remember anymore. But his dad coached his team and I remember the games against them being some of my personal best. I don't know why that was; but I excelled. We would play kickball at recess and he'd sometimes kick the ball farthest than anyone playing in the game. Another fond memory of recess was when he and I, along with a bunch of other classmates glided along an area of ice that had formed somewhere in the school playground. Even though we had been told not to play on the ice, we still did. We all ended up getting caught and sent inside to write 100 sentences about not going on the ice. I think it was a shock to many people seeing myself, Doug, and Erik sent inside for getting in trouble because I'll admit we NEVER got in trouble. At the time I remember being very upset about this; but now I find it very funny. I even think I have those 100 sentences somewhere as a momento of that situation.

Doug and Erik both stood up for me one time during recess. We must've been in first or second grade and a group of us were playing on the slide in the back of the school. I can't remember the circumstances why we weren't allowed to play on the slide, for whatever reason. I think it was deemed unsafe since it was placed in the very back of the school where it was very hard for the supervisor to keep a watch on both areas of the playground. Anyways, somehow I got wrongly accused of being with the group that played on the slide. The third grade teacher at the time ordered all of the kids to line up against the school and she hollered at each and every one of us for going on that slide. I started bawling my eyes out because I never liked being yelled at; especially when I was being wrongly accused. Doug and Erik pleaded with the teacher that I was simply at the wrong place at the wrong time, but it didn't help. I don't think any of us got in any real trouble; we just got a good scolding. However, I can't forget Erik and Doug trying to bail me out like they did.

Another memory was when Doug called me on the telephone. I believe it was to invite me to his birthday party. I can't remember all that we talked about; yes we discussed the party, but that was basically it. I remember a dead silence on the phone for about five to ten minutes because neither of us could think of a thing to talk about! Eventually I just said "I've got to go," and we both said goodbye and hung up. But we were so young and naive at the time, and it remains one of those funnier memories that I have of Doug.

Back in the sixth grade, Doug was hinting to us that his family might be moving to a larger community 20 miles away. In fact, it seemed like he was always warning us about a possible move away from our school district throughout elementary; but it never materialized. I was glad because I hated the thought of losing my best friend. The same happened after the sixth grade; he returned to Superior Central for his seventh grade year. He lived in a very small and cramped home in his hometown and he had many relatives in the town his family was planning to move to. Also, I believe his parents worked near that community, so it only made sense to them. But to me, I was being selfish and didn't want to lose my best friend. Sure, I let Doug know that I didn't want him to leave, but then I didn't rant and rave about it, either. It finally happened in the eighth grade. During the summer before my eighth grade year started, I personally witnessed the partial demolition of his old home. We always went to church in his hometown so it was pretty common to see where he lived. As we drove by that summer day, I saw part of his house completely demolished and a backhoe still on the property. Since it was a Sunday, naturally nobody was there to work on it. But a few weeks later, the house was completely gone. My hope was that they were building a new house there, but even that seemed like a pipe dream considering that the property he lived on was very small. Nothing ever sprang up on that piece of property and it remains empty to this day.

When my eighth grade year started and we first met together as a class, I didn't see Doug. I searched and searched and couldn't find him. I had then overheard the news; Doug had moved away. You don't know how many times I had heard the threat about him moving away when I was in grade school, but to actually hear it be true, I was devestated. I honestly felt alone. My best friend Erik had become a prick over the summer and acted like my worst enemy. My eighth grade year probably was my worst one in school. In fact, it was a nightmare. But in time, I got over the fact that he had moved and had settled myself down during the new school year. On a few occasions afterwards, he would attend some of the basketball games at our school and I would briefly visit with him. Myself and a couple of other friends also had the opportunity to visit Doug and see him at his new home. But other than that, we eventually drifted apart. For awhile we'd send letters to each other; in fact, I received a letter from him right after the new school year started when I was in eighth grade about him moving away. Talk about too little too late. But eventually the novelty of writing letters wore off. We never called each other on the phone; both of us considered it too awkward, for whatever reason. Eventually, I never heard from him for awhile.

My grandmother had found a news clipping about Doug in the area newspaper where he now resided. It had his picture and he was working at the local golf club getting ready for the golfing season. This had to have been in the ninth or tenth grade, and he still looked basically the same. I kept onto that clipping and I still have it around somewhere. Then during my first few years in college, I had managed to be in touch with Doug's cousin through instant messenger. You could call it a chance meeting and she just happened to be his cousin. In fact, she saw Doug everyday. I about fell over when she told me he had the instant messenger, too! Shortly thereafter, Doug and I started talking again. We were getting caught up about all that we had missed in the last five years or so and it was really fun being able to talk to him again, albeit it not face to face. That only lasted for about a week until I never saw Doug on-line again. In fact, his cousin confirmed that he had gotten rid of his computer and was no longer on-line. I was a bit disappointed, but I didn't let it bother me. Another revelation that was a shock to me about Doug was that he had lost all of that weight that had plagued him during his tenure at Superior Central. He was slender, slim, and even more skinny than me at that time. I was floored and was hoping to see a picture of the "new" Doug. But alas, he never provided one and I soon never heard from him again.

His cousin and I chatted a few times after that. Apparently he is now married, own's a popular restaurant in his town (at the time, he was in the process of buying it), and was learning to become a minister. Whether he still owns that restaurant and is a full-fledged minister; I don't know. We lost contact and I hadn't heard from him in over four years now. In fact, I don't think we've had a face-to-face meeting in close to ten years. I have since moved on and accepted the fact that we are no longer friends and I believe there is no anymosity between us two. It's the distance that killed our friendship. Despite us not being friends anymore, I can never forget what he meant to me while I was in elementary. He was friend, a pal, a compadre and that is something I'll never forget. And maybe someday, somehow, we will get back in touch again.